Talking about SEX!!

Let's Talk About Sex!!

There exists a strange dichotomy between the portrayal of sex in our 24/7/365 media and what is "accepted" by society as being something to be talked about openly.

What is the hangup with sex in our culture?

Sex is something we all think about from the time our bodies start to mature, a biological imperative, good for relieving stress, connecting on a deeper intimate level with one's partner, etc., etc. - but yet it is still strictly viewed as verboten in most circles to admit that you personally have desire or needs. In fact women with the same sex drive as men are too often labeled as "easy" or "sluts" in our society.

I do not really care what turns you on - that is your own private business of course - but the moralizing judgment in public of those who embrace their own kinks in private has to stop. That is simply my opinion of course - and I will qualify that as I always do with one of my favorite phrases. "Your mileage may vary."

As most of you are probably aware of by now - I write erotica. Erotica is an interesting genre in that it is one of those things that people enjoy, but are not likely to talk about in "polite society". Erotica also seems to get a bad rap sometimes as people tend to confuse it with porn. Think of it this way - with porn you are getting nothing but descriptions of the sex acts. With erotica you are seeing behind the scenes - so to speak - and enjoying the thoughts and feeling of your characters. There is a discernible story line and shockingly enough the story could probably stand on its own merits without the explicit descriptions.

Anyway - I digress - as I tend to do on occasion.

So - what does the societal hangup with sex have to do with erotica? Good question - I'm glad you asked. ;-)

As an author of erotica I have found it to be quite the uphill battle to spread the word about my writing to a larger audience. Even with 75+ four and five star reviews - there is something missing.

Anyone want to venture a guess? Go ahead - think about it - I'll wait right here ... raise a hand when you are ready.

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Yes? I said raise your *hand* back there in the third row - although that *is* quite impressive.

Where was I?

Ah yes - what is missing? Word of mouth. Societal shunning. The virtual equivalent of that Scarlet Letter we all remember from so many years ago.

For example - I recently posted about Volume Two of my Summer's Journey series being FREE for two days on Amazon. (Okay - so I posted A LOT about that - what's your point?)

There exists a forum that I participate in wherein a bunch of authors talk about their experiences with KDP Select and their results from having one of their books free.

An author who had one of their books free during the same time period I did experienced 12,000 downloads in the period of two days - driving their ebook into the Top 100 in the Amazon store - gaining them some valuable exposure.

In the same time period - despite my best efforts at having freebie sites list my book as free to their wider audiences, not one of them did - and my free downloads were about 1,200 - or 1/10th of the other indie author.

Why you may ask? Was this author's book that much better than mine?

I submit it was simply because my ebook was erotica and this other book was in a more "acceptable" genre. Now - some of you will say - (and you will be right) that I chose to write in this particular genre (well - actually it chose me - but that is a whole other story) - and that genre choice is what is limiting me.

True enough I suppose, but let's go back for a moment to what I said was missing.

Word of mouth. Even in this day and age of vast new resources online for self-promotion and marketing - the number one best friend of any author is still word of mouth "advertising". A reader enjoys your work and passes on word about it to a friend or family member. That person tells someone else, and so on and so forth.

This does not occur to the same degree with erotica - due to the societal stigma associated with talking about sex. This is an interesting phenomena that even extends to fellow authors. On that same forum I was talking about earlier - I posted a few questions about my own experiences with the free book giveaway. Even my fellow authors seemed to go out of their way to distance themselves from the erotica author.

Readers will contact me and say they LOVED the first volume of the series - can't wait to read more, but they hope I will understand if they don't tell anyone they loved it - their family, friends, pastor and German Shepard would be shocked to know they were reading that kind of material.

So ... what's my point ...?

I'm not sure I have one - after all of that - so if you were waiting on one - oops. ;-)

Maybe I just think we should initiate (somehow) a healthier societal attitude towards sex. A more realistic one that acknowledges human sexuality instead of berating it - or idealizing a particular body image through the media.

Of course - that *could* simply be the self promotional erotica author in me saying that. ;-)

Embrace your sexuality and love one another. Life is too short and we are all in this together.

Bad, bad, blogger!!

Sigh.  I have been bad.  Very bad.

I have not blogged in what seems like forever.

A lot has happened in the meantime.

I finally finished and published Summer's Journey: Volume Three - Bondage Ballet - after struggling with it over the holidays, being sick, etc.

I decided to put out an omnibus edition of Volumes One through Three ... simply called Collection One - which saves new readers 25% over purchasing the volumes individually.

I have been very active on Google Plus, Facebook - and occasionally Twitter - self-promoting the series and interacting with readers and fellow authors.

I have run free promotions of Volumes One and Two of the series which have led to a few sales here and there, but still have not had that "breakthrough" moment that I am looking for.

I have some thoughts as to why that might be - which I will address in my next blog post.

In the meantime - I am back ... and if you have not read Volumes One through Three of my Summer's Journey series - what on earth are you waiting for?

73 total Amazon reviews now - with a 4.7 out of 5 Star Average.  Come find out why!!


Summer Daniels' Amazon Author page

Six Sentence Sunday - 11/20/11

From my Work in Progress - Volume Three of my Summer's Journey series:

I am not a morning person.  Even on the best of days my staff knows to steer clear of me until well after the caffeine has kicked in.  Monday mornings in particular I truly believe were invented by sadistic demons in one of Dante’s lower circles of hell.

So why on this Monday morning before my second cup of coffee was finished, was I sitting in my office with a smile from ear to ear?

From Friday evening until now my emotions rode quite the roller coaster of unbelievable highs and unexpected lows.

Pleasures beyond compare to start the weekend gave way to introspection and wandering around my empty apartment staring at nothing in particular.

Guest Post and Review over at Rage, Sex, and Teddy Bears!!

Come take a look at my guest post over at the very HOT blog: Rage, Sex, and Teddy Bears.

I am writing today about my journey from in control to losing control.

Check out the review as well following the Guest Post.

"For fans familiar with the first story, expect the heat level to jump to supernova in this book."

Get your towels ready - things are going to get wet!!

http://ragesexandteddybears.blogspot.com/2011/11/carpe-libido-seize-your-sex-drive-guest.html

Six Sentence Sunday - 11/13/11

From Volume Two: Alphabetical Assignation -


I sensed him kneel between my legs as he gently forced my knees apart, leaving me feeling very vulnerable and exposed. In the past when my ex-husband had somewhat reluctantly given me oral pleasure, I always felt to some degree as if I should be doing something instead of just laying there. For some reason it did not feel that way tonight, I felt totally at ease and relaxed with Mark, albeit incredibly turned on as well.


The first touch of his warm tongue on my wet labia drove any and all thoughts from my mind. He swiped his tongue slowly from bottom to top, darting all around my sensitive clit without actually touching it. He reached up and lifted my knees toward my chest and softly murmured “hold your legs up for me.”

http://www.amazon.com/Summers-Journey-Alphabetical-Assignation-ebook/dp/B005WE0X2E/

Guest Post from Author Charlie Kenmore

CHALLENGING ONESELF AS A WRITER: KEEPING THE SEX SCENE REAL

BY CHARLIE KENMORE

One of the lead stories in last week’s news was about a local deputy who is accused of taking sexual liberties with female prisoners. As news stories go, this one was pretty salacious. Of course, there was no actual recounting of the sex. Given the same factual scenario in a work of fiction, the setting was great for writing some serious “Prison Sex" encounters.

As a fiction writer, I have a luxury that news reporters don’t have. My characters can do anything I want them to, any time, any place, any way. But as any Spiderman fan knows, “With great power comes great responsibility.”  It isn’t enough to place a sex scene in an unusual setting.  There is more to a sex scene than merely making the female and male parts fit together. The scene still has to be believable within the context of the work.

When it comes to writing a sex scene, I have a basic checklist:

A) Set up: is there enough background to support the scene?

Tom dropped the letters into the mailbox slot. He flipped the door several times to make sure that all of the letters fell into the box. Mary, a tall, buxom business woman waiting to deposit her letter tapped her foot impatiently. He turned to her, “Is there a problem?”  Their eyes met, the untamed fire in hers immediately lighting a fire in his groin. He ripped open her blouse as she unfastened his belt.

This scenario doesn’t seem likely even for a hand-held camera, 8mm black and white porno. There needs to be a believable build up, however unlikely the setting. Part, or even a substantial portion, of the build up can occur offstage in indirect action. But the buildup is still necessary. The more improbable the setting, the greater the need for a solid foundation for a sex scene. Even if the scene is just casual sex for the sake of having sex, the characters still need to connect in a believable manner. If the reader remains skeptical that the characters are about to have sex in the scene, then the scene will fail.

B) Foreplay: is there enough?

Bill hit “play”, and set the remote on the arm of the black, leather couch. He put his arm around Suzy, who snuggled closer. She turned her head, and opened her mouth for a kiss. His tongue met hers as he rucked up her skirt. He drove into her powerfully, as relentless as a force of nature.

This is a bit thin on details. The reader is probably going to need a bit more information on their feelings and reactions to tactile stimulation before reaching the “force of nature” bit.

C) Temporal consistency and mechanics: does the sex scene work from technical point of view?

One problem that I’ve found in sex scenes that I’ve edited is that the mechanics of the scene are off. In one memorable scene, the couple is coupling fiercely. Two paragraphs later, she unzips his slacks and takes his cock out. Being old fashioned, I suggested that the paragraphs needed to be reversed. In another scene, the man held her breast in one hand and fingered her dripping pussy with the other. She moaned as he pulled her hair. My question as the editor was, pulled her hair with what? His teeth?

D) Originality: 1) what makes this scene different from the other sex scenes in the book?

Chapter Three: Mary slowly did a scissors split,  impaling herself, as she slid down Tom’s long, thick rod until she was filled.

Chapter Seven: Suzy swung her legs out of the pike position, and flipped one leg over each of the parallel bars. She spread her legs until they were straight out at her sides in a perfect split. Bill reached around her and grabbed her breasts as he slid his long, hard shaft into her until she was filled.

Been there, done that. Yes, Mary was in the bedroom, and Suzy was in the gym. But the novelty of a woman doing the splits wore off after the first time. One of the splits has to go. If the reader really likes the splits scene, then s(he) can reread Chapter Three. Chapter Seven needs to give the reader something new.

2) Word choices?

How many times do the same words or variations on a root word repeat?  Using “throb”or “throbbed” in every sex scene will bore the reader at best, or at worst, produce a throbbing headache. Find some new adjectives.  If in Chapter Three, Mary “slid” until “she was filled”, then in Chapter Seven, Tom’s actions need to be something other than “slid” until “she was filled”.  I would need to find a new verb for “slid”, and a new adjective for “filled”.

In Earth Angel, there was a brief stand alone sex scene that my editor wanted to cut because she didn’t think it added anything. I disagreed because I wanted to change the pace at that point, and work on character development rather than plot development. The scene stayed after we discussed its purpose. But to make sure the scene added something, I still had to make sure that it fit within the internal logic of the overall story, and didn’t merely rehash stock footage from a prior sex scene.  

Thanks for letting me ramble.

CK

EARTH ANGEL By CHARLIE KENMORE

Blurb: There are seven parallel worlds known as the Seven Realms which are separated by a Veil. Six are inhabited by all manner of entities, some natural, some not. That may not be the case for much longer. The first portion of the High Sidhe Prophecy of the Sevens has been fulfilled. The Anarch, who is one with the Veil, has escaped. If she chooses, she can part or drop the Veil or she can lift the Veil in its entirety. The Seven Realms will converge. The laws of physics and magic will collide head on. Unless she is stopped, there will be nothing left.

Queen Amura has called for an assembly of the signatories to the High Sidhe's Second Accords, a multi-realm peace treaty to consider how to deal with the threat of the Anarch. An Earthside TechnoWitch and other dark forces also are  seeking to control the Anarch. Prince Dzhok (Jack), High Sidhe Ambassador Salash (Jack's oldest friend and lover), and Valkyrie Brunhilde set out to find and befriend the Anarch before all is lost.

Purchase Links: http://www.damnationbooks.com/book.php?isbn=9781615724840

(you have to register-free)

http://www.amazon.com/Earth-Angel-ebook/dp/B005KMQAA2/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1315450669&sr=1-1

http://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-earthangel-599934-140.html

Excerpt:

Jack took a moment, and then he saw the light. Unfortunately, it appeared to be attached to an oncoming train. Jack was no pacifist. Like Salash, he would kill to protect his children (and had). But as a pansexual high blood Prince of the Human Whisperers and Allied Kinds, "make love, not war" was not a mere platitude, but rather was the very core of his being. Jack knew that he would have little influence on the upcoming gathering in Paradox. This was not a symposium. It was a war council. The outcome was fairly certain. His Mother and her allies would seek to kill the Chosen. And they would fail miserably.

"We have to find her first."

"Exactly, Jack."

You've got mail.

Salash reached over and pulled the MAPP out of Jack's pocket. She rolled down her window, and with a flick of her wrist, sent it pin wheeling into a fresh steaming pile of bison dung. Salash paused and scanned the tree line. She was fairly certain at least one of the shadows had flinched. 

Great Reviews for Volume Two - Alphabetical Assignation!!

Volume Two of my Summer's Journey series continues to garner some great reviews!

http://alexxmomcatgatewaybookblog.blogspot.com/2011/11/summers-journey-volume-ii-by-summer.html

And on Amazon - 9 Reviews - 4.8 Stars out of 5 - on Average!!

http://www.amazon.com/Summers-Journey-Alphabetical-Assignation-ebook/product-reviews/B005WE0X2E/ref=cm_cr_pr_top_recent?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=0&sortBy=bySubmissionDateDescending